Making A Stand

Darts of harsh words

Sting my unseen sheath

Tearing them apart

If only they were

Sticks and stones

Leaving proof of marks

May be you would stop

Giving me a chance

To tend to my wounds.

 

 

Words used with, guided missile preciseness

How powerful you must feel

As you put me down

Punched and kicked, as I kneel.

 

 

Enough!! My mind screams

I stand up

As you stare back menacingly.

Gathering up courage

Pushing aside long grown fear

I watch your eyes, shift with doubt

My mind stilled with the decision,

Come what may -

Today, I stand my Ground,

Yet, continue to move.

Today I will push back,

Without pushing you.

Today I will fight,

Without fighting you.

 

 

With a smile I walk away,

Leaving you be

In letting you go

I set myself free.

They say

They say, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

But this apple has rolled far.

So far, that it can’t roll back into the shade of its tree.

Would an apple tree grow under the shade of the other trees?

They say, that there’s always a someone,

We want to hold on to.

It is you, it isn’t me,

Why does it not hold for both you and me?

They say, the truth sets you free.

The truth I heard, has made me

As knotted up as can be.

Will I be set free?

They say, time heals all wounds,

Yet, there are wounds that never do so

They ache in the most inopportune moments.

Would time heal it before we pass?

They say, they said so, from their consistent experience,

Yet, none of mine is consistent with theirs.

A square peg in this round world

Would the edges smooth out?

Distance

There is so much I want to say to you, but, every time I start, I realize it doesn’t matter what I say to you.  You, are you and I, am I. Between the words, You and I, is a vast World, a world that spans a few Galaxies and infinite Time zones.  Between You and I are gaping differences, too large and peeping similarities, too insignificant.  Such being the reality, it contradicts another reality. This reality is exclusively mine- I feel the need to be in that part of the world where you are.  Every time I feel your resistance to allow me in, I am in conflict. There is this part of me that defines a winner, that feels the Need to push harder at resistance so that I will Get what I Want. And I wonder, does that mean, I am a Go-Getter?  There is this other part of me, that doesn’t care about definitions, and feels the need to go with the flow, which means, I need to let you be, and let the chips fall where they will. And I wonder, does that mean, I am Courageous?  And there is this part of me that questions- why I feel the need to be in your world, could it be because you resist?  If you didn’t resist would I find you interesting at all? Would I pay attention to you?  Would I have you as part my life?  Or would I pass you by like those countless people I pass by as I go about my life?

I wonder, what would happen if I crossed that invisible line that we have drawn, around which we dance our dances alone, as the music play.  Across which we eye each other, prudently using our sight, aiming at each other only when the other is oblivious.  That thin measly line, that makes the perspective of distance, ironic, as we dance within each other’s reach, yet never stretch our arms to reach for the other. 

CC #99 - My Prison

What would I be willing to give,
To know the completeness of my being?

Once in a while,
I feel the wisp of my boundlessness,
In a dot of a moment,
A blink of Knowing
Only to be left alone with a longing
to Know again, to Hold forever.

What have I, that is Mine to give,
when, what I have, was never mine?

Mine- this word needs to be Mined,
For, it holds so many ores of meaning,
Seamlessly, yet  constantly changing with time.
How do I claim ownership, when I feel none
For, what is, does not belong to me alone?

How easy it would be to be able to live an illusion,
With those that live their illusions.
After all, there's a strength in numbers and bonds in groups.

Yet, when the day breaks
And I am alone in the soul's silence,
I catch a glimpse of truth,
And know the Illusion.

How then, do I learn to travel in comfort,
With the Nights of Illusion and the Days of Truth
Within their changing in constance?

© RKP

Creative Challenge #99 Tour

Beyond Reach

Standing together
Facing each other
In an unspoken circle
Saying little
Talking a lot
Yesterday
Today
Tomorrow.

To be Right
Forever be Right
I try to understand
Reaching out far
Stretched fingertips touch
Yet, I fail to grasp
Then
Now
Forever
Same like when we started
Our Talk
Saying little
Talking a lot
Still in that circle
Shaking my head
Failing to grasp.

God IS

I feel reluctant to talk about God
For I have Seen
If I talked of God to the others
There will always be a someone who doesn't believe like I do
My noise about God will make them argumentative
Making us lose the harmony that Envelops ALL.
There will always be someone who believes like I do
My words about God will make them feel the Strength in Numbers
Making them believe that they can get away with anything they do to others.
There will always be someone who doesn't believe in a God
My talk about God will sound like judgement to them
Making them disconnect from who and what we are to each other.
There will always be someone who claims God with a different Name and Meaning
My talk about God will sound like I am bragging and boasting
Making them want to put me in my place.
There will always be someone who worships God differently
My talk about God will sound disrespectful and blasphemous
Making them want to teach me the RIGHT and ONLY way.
There will always be people who don't have the same morals and ethics as I do
My talk about God will seem like I am imposing on them to live like I do
Making them Resist my open-ness and trust.

I hold God like my husband-
In the depths of my heart,
In sickness and in health
In poverty and in wealth
In Love and in Hate
In Kindness and in Unkindness
In All those ambivalent moments.
God is in how I hold Nature
With care enough to let her be
Without arrogance, with reverence.
God is in how I hold my Friends
In the Care, Nurture, Support and Kindness
In the laughter and the tears
God is in how I hold children
In awe, love, joy, being there for them
In the ouches and the giggles
God is in how I hold my elders
In respect, surrender, obedience and reverence
In learning through their wisdom
God is in how I treat strangers
In respect,  trusting and helpful
In listening to their messages.
God is in the Work I do
With dedication, in humbleness and sincerity
In doing my best in all that I can do
From Now that wasn't the Now
To the Then that will soon be Now
From the Place where my body stands
To the Places that my mind can reach
Within the Depths of my Heart
To the expanse of the Universe
God just IS.

P.S.  This is the only time I am making an exception to talk about God…I do this ’cause I felt the need to Vent and be Done.

Who are you?

Memories are strange things. There are times when I cant tell if what I know is a memory of something that happened or if it is a dream from some other place. There are memories of places, people and times that I am sure I have not met in this life of mine.

If I were to pinpoint the exact time my heart felt you, I should go back a few lifetimes, hard as that is to believe. I feel your presence around me, even when my eyes don’t see you. I know your thoughts like I do my own thoughts. I feel your touch like I feel the passing breeze that caresses my face on a cool summer day. People say I am a Loner but I am never alone, never really alone.

There are days when you appear. I am not sure if it is my dreams or if it is your world. But I see you as clear as the Moon on a dark night. I see your impish yet wise face, dark hair and the glint of mischief in your eyes, that endearing smile on your lips that makes dimples on your cheeks. We have pleasant walks over beautiful meadows overlooking mountains, picking flowers or along the river bank feeling the wet soil or the sand or a trail in the woods with the sounds of songbirds. We frolic in the waters, pick fruits from laden trees, walk amongst the gentle animals or sometimes pet the Big Cats. Sometimes we share long conversations, or very comfortable silences with smiles that warm our insides, the kind that leaves joy and peace within my self as I come out of the fog. I always know I will see you again, that the coming of the fog only means that our time with each other was up for my day. I never remember the conversations except for the feeling of being happy. But the words you said come to me at certain times in my life, like a reminder. It feels like as if its something my elder has taught me, like as if I already knew, like its part of me but really not from me.

It makes me curious…who are you? Are you a visitor from my past or part of the present or will be part of my future? There are people who remind me of you, like you split yourself into those many others. You feel like a friend almost bordering someone I love but I also feel an unseen line that we are careful not to cross. Nothing is said but is understood. Would a day arrive where the world where you are and the world where I seemingly am, could blend into One? As I wait for an answer, I do wish for you to remain a part of me even if I don’t really know who you are. It doesn’t matter, for I have my names for you so that I may claim you for myself—my soul’s guard, my place of happiness, my place of understanding who I am.