One would think that after nearly a decade of life in the land of plenty, there is nothing that one could ever ask for. For many Indian families, coming to the USA is a boon. It means financial security, educational opportunities, better job prospects and better standard of living. Most come here hoping to return to their homeland. But reality is so different from logic.
Coming to the USA, wasn't something I dreamed of doing or even wanted to do but it seemed like it was my destiny to live here. I came here because my husband had a job here, after all a wife's place is with her husband. My knowledge of the US was limited to geography, history, news reports and movies. I didn't have an opinion of US. I was open to anything.
I got off the Flight from India at the Newark Airport. From the window of the aircraft, the scenery was so beautiful, it almost felt like it was fairyland (not that I had been to one ever). There was snow all over; the trees looked like brides with their lacy veils on. We took an airport shuttle to the Hotel from where my husband's friend was to pick us up. On my husbands advice I had a jacket on. We got of the shuttle under the hotels huge canopy. It must have been about 12 paces from the door of the shuttle to the door of the hotel. I could only take 4 steps... I was so cold it felt like my brain had frozen. Just two days ago I was in a place where the sun was shining and it was a warm 27°C and it was probably below 0ºC in Newark on that day. My first lesson: Snow looks wonderful on greeting cards and from inside an aircraft or vehicle, not fun to walk on or to feel it without appropriate clothing and accessories.
I was looking forward for life with my husband. Who would have thought it would be like what it was. People say that the first month after marriage is the most blissful; I don't know what to call it. We moved into a friend's apartment till we could find a place of our own. The friends were at the time, in India. I was jetlagged. I dozed of at all odd hours. One evening in the first week, I locked my husband out of the house because I was in deep slumber when he came home. I woke with a start and realized that there was someone at the door. Quiet disoriented I walk down the stairs to open the door and my frantic husband stood there. He thought something bad must have happened to me and was going to the neighbors to call the cops.
I had lived all my life in Bangalore until my marriage. Everything I knew about the world was what I learned from people in my life, school and college. Most of my friends, were what we call "chaddi dost"- Friends from diaper-hood. They knew everything there was to know about me and I of them. We didn't need to speak to let the other know if we needed something. It was a kind of undefined knowing, an attachment and affection that we shared. Marriage was a fork in the road of our relationship. I was leaving everything I ever knew, all the people I knew, just to follow my husband.
I felt like a huge banyan tree that was yanked of its roots and planted in the Artic. I didn't have any family (other than my husband), any friends, any familiar smells, people or color; everything was either white or streaked with brown. I just had acquaintances, people I met through my husband. Husband would leave at 7 am in the morning and would return at about 7 or 8 pm. I spent the first few days trying to get over jetlag; then I spent time cleaning up; arranging and re-arranging the arranged books; dusted furniture that for some weird reason just didn't collect dust; played computer games, read books, watched TV, ran to the window when I heard a car or any noise. The word entertainment had a whole new meaning to me. I was completely bored, scared and lonely. When the phone rang, I could feel the smile on my lips... ah someone to talk to, it didn't matter if it was an annoying salesman. For someone who had lived in total lack of privacy, for someone who had friends in every house in block where I lived before, for someone who had never lived alone ever, I had an abundance of space all around me. Does breathing become easy when there is space? Yes it does, but my innards were shrinking due to over-oxygenation.
Maybe I should find a job, just to get over my boredom. Ok... But then we weren't going to live in NJ for more than a month because we found a place in Philadelphia downtown. Husband's place of work was 20 min. walk from the house and the job was just for another month because he had found another better paying job in the west coast in the state of Oregon. Oregon, name sounds very familiar. Oh yes! I read about the Oregon Trail in a National geographic magazine when I was in school. I was so fascinated by the illustrations and photos of the place that I had made an amateur sketch of a caravan of wagons and imagined myself picking flowers on the meadows in Oregon. At that time, I never knew that imaginations could manifest. So in a month's time we pack to move to Oregon to the city of Portland. We didn't have much to pack just the utensils, TV, clothes and Car.
Portland Airport... Beautiful!! who would have thought that it takes about 8 hours by flight to get from Philly to Portland? The car ride from the Airport to the Hotel was really breathtaking... everything was green... and off in the distant we could see the Pink Mount Hood... the snow hadn't all melted.. So it had this really beautiful colour to it. It was drizzling... The Person who picked us at the airport explains that Portland has rains for about 250 days of the year... My jaw drops... what!! I escape the snow for the rain, but its just rain, like the monsoons in India... Right! Only when it started did I know that when it rains, it is freezing too. It's not like the Indian monsoons I knew where you sweat in the rain.
It fascinated me that people in the US followed the traffic rules most of the time. It also frightened me when I considered the speed at which traffic moved. My biggest obstacle to overcome was driving. It scared me to death to sit behind the wheel. I had such weird pictures in my head of car crashes and people dying, and somehow it was my fault. "You don't have a choice", my husband told me "your car, is your feet, here". So I took driving lessons. I drove alright as long as the road was empty and I didn't have to change lanes or drive on the highway. I failed twice before I got my drivers license. Once I got the license, it was a relief, now it doesn't really matter if I don't drive.
I start looking for a job in Oregon... first question; do you have a green card? Answer - No, "well we don't file for H1". After sometime I decide, forget it, I don't need a job. I will study further... so I enroll in a community college. I fill the application and I mark myself as Asian and the lady at the counter asks "where are you from?" I say "I am from India". She tells me mark "other". I am baffled isn't India part of Asia? Well, it doesn't matter, I had to write an entrance test and then I am in. The College experience was something I still cherish. I took the bus, met different people of more different accents than I had, and culture than I was. I had homework to do and reading to review. I met a few fellow Indians too in the process. Few became more than acquaintances but not really friends. Making friends was tough for me. None equaled the simple uncomplicated friendships I had back home, when I was younger.
I learned to call - a flashlight, a flashlight and not torch; a trunk, a trunk not dicky;I also learned to spell.. colours as colors and honour as honor, cheques as Checks. I also learned that in the US you can spend more than what you have via the credit cards. It was a weird lesson for someone who is taught from the time she could understand that you don't spend what you don't have or haven't earned or that to be in debt was very shameful existence. I still learn new things everyday.
The best thing I ever had in the US was access to a library. I enjoyed reading, but when you could read books for free (at least you didn't pay up front), its heaven. A world of words with new meanings entered my vocabulary. Words like freedom, democracy, globalization, capitalism, leadership, racism, discrimination, civil rights, evangelism, euthanasia, sexual orientations/fetishes etc. and they were different from the definitions I learned in my own country. I read books which I never read in my own country- the Vedas, on yoga and other sacred texts of Hinduism, folktales from other cultures and so many other topics. I learned more about Hinduism in the US than in India. It was Ironic.
Coming from an "Indian Culture", I had presumed that there was something called American culture, I was wrong. It was baseball sometimes, it was basketball at others. It was Pizza sometimes; it was hotdog and corndog at others. It was blatantly sexual sometimes; it was very tender and sensual at others. It was ignorance one day and arrogance the next. Then one day in my mind's chatter a sudden common thread came to my view- its people doing what people anywhere do. All living, breathing, working, loving just so they have the life they want to have. Almost everyone came here as immigrants, becoming natives only in the last 350 years. The written history of the USA is very young while its spiritual history and history of its soil is as old as India herself. Everything is different superficially but at the core it's a culture of human beings in all their glory and all their blunders.
I know that Life as I knew it, is in the past, Life that I have right now is all that I have and the Life I wish it was is what I can strive for. I still don't know if I should call this country Home although technically, I do know that the place where you hang your hat is Home. I do know one thing, I am lucky to have views from two opposing sides of the globe. Coming to this country has taught me to be more accepting of the good and bad, of pleasure and pain. I have realized that everything is black or white only when you are at one place, but when you move from one place to another there are more tones of grey than the Grey we know. The Elders were right when they said "From being able get a view from above, you realize that all is as it should be". Being able to take the whole picture as it is, not as you would wish it to be, is a blessing. I hope to pass on these subtle insights to my kids, who will call this country their home.
71 comments:
Thank you for this insight of your life in USA from your first arrival since now.
It is very interesting for someone like me cos I have never leaved my country and I can only imagine
this experience. And as always, you have written from you heart.
Hugs Rashmi...
That is a very interesting blog to read, Rashmi. I think some of your blogs , like this one, should be open to the public, they're so good. I'd be interested to see some more blogs on those definitions you mention: the difference between what those words mean in India and what they mean in the US. Actually I'd love it if you'd make this public so I can recommend it.
This is a great blog Rashmi, it took a lot of courage for you coming here leaving everyone you knew and loved behind to come to a land of strangers, thanks for sharing that view i never thought about that. I'm happy for you that you are enjoying it here and adapting well, college here is very expensive, mostly the rich are the ones who get to go, unless people are able to get loans for a community college but it too is expensive. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, i enjoyed reading this !
Thank you Claudia. :). There are some really hilarious experiences too... I will write about them soon.
Great, thanks Rashmi. I'll recommend it on my next blog.
Thank you Giles. I did write about Discrimination/rascism. Though I didnt explicitly mention the word Rascism. The others I did think about writing...I havent got to it though.
Thank you. :). I dont know if its courage, its mostly, "I have no choice, I have to do this" and so I did. College is expensive, especially if you arent a citizen. I realized that after I did about 19 credits... so I did quit after I realized its either quit or get into a debt. I prefer not being in debt. Most colleges have a different Fee Structure for Citizens, Residents and International students.. I was paying 2 times the fee compared to a citizen... apart from expenses like text books, transportation etc.
The fees difference happens here as well. What were you studying?
I was planning on getting into the IT field, just like Hubby...
Did you enjoy it while you did it? The subject I mean?
It was fun.. but I was at the beginning rung so I had to re-study English, Math, Basics in Puters.. which I had done back home only it wasnt a Four Year Engineering course, and they require that we have 16 year Study record. So the subject matter was like refreshing what I had studied but the presentation was in a different mode.
What was the difference in presentation?
Presentation depended more on Pre-study by the student(I mostly post-studied in the past) and the teacher was there to answer our doubts not give a lecture on the subject. Once the chapter closed we had a "multiple choice Test" as opposed to an exam(back home) where we had to do all these diagrams, and explain in long essays depending on how many marks were allotted to the question. In English we had to pool in ideas about a topic and present it to the class of students, it was then judged by the students, who pointed out where we could better the draft or change the draft. The teacher corrected the Grammer and Linguistic Rules and asked questions to draw out the subject as opposed to Teacher telling us how she wanted our work to look and how we had to do it. So there was freedom for Creativity and our own ideas without the need to Conform strictly.
I understand. Less rote learning.
Exactly.. but there was a flaw as usual, we couldnt really tell how much a student knew or if the student understood the subject when no questions were asked. At the end of the term the student was graded partly on whether they got their multiple choices right or wrong the Consistency of Work done and submitted. Back home it completely depended on how you fare in your Final Exam. No matter how consistent you are with your work, the final result of PASS or FAIL depended on the marks obtained in your finals. The "getting your foot in for a Job" depended on those Marks.
I recently watched a programme about the Calcutta Railway and the exams people had to take to get a job on it. The stress they were under was enormous, since it was a job for life, with housing, pension, social amenities etc thrown in.
It is very stressful, but the other option is even more stressful-imagine trying to live without earning enough for basic needs or having to depend on aging parents for the rest of your life(which results in loss of respect or status within your family/society), just because you didnt get the required marks to get a job, while your parents did everything in their power just so you could study and get a good job. So take the easy way out, STUDY. :)
I had no idea they charged more if you aren't a citizen, i know being a citizen is high too, its a shame you had to drop out, maybe later if u decide to become a citizen you can go back, if the job you are seeking is a high paying job in the long run your college expense's will pay off, id try to stay away from the credit cards if i was you , we have used a few and are now regretting it !
Is it that easy, if the only way to better life except for an entrepreneurial minority is through an examination system in which 50,000 people compete for 1000 jobs?
Giles sent me over here to read your blog. We're only human here, you're right about that. I hope that you find America a good place to live and raise your kids.
I'm from Giles and I thank you for opening this blog for everybody - I salute you since I'm not sure I can do the same thing for some of my posts... Anyhow, I have friends moving to America and I need this blog - I want to know how they are experiencing the whole thing.
Again, thank you so much and I wish you good luck!
I came here by way of Giles. It must have been hard to live here not knowing anyone. You write about it beautifully.
LOL for a minute the picture of your avatar threw me.. wondered who on earth you Were -
For most Middle Class Indians that used to be the Easy way, inspite of the competition... to Study, get in the job market somewhere where you didnt have to worry about basic necessities and then move where you want. Its not the reality for poorer People..India has a large level of Poverty. Enterpreneurial Minority is really that, a minority. Indian enterprenuers were mostly those who had a Good Backing Financially when they start the Business, usually because their family was already in some business making big bucks. The trend changed a little later, but its still a small number for the total population we have.
:) I did think that for a while, I couldnt tell my parents I dropped out for a while cause I felt ashamed. I did tell them later on cause I had to choose between lying or facing up to the shame.. I did the later.
I calculated on the expenses and how much I would start with if I got a job and realized I would spend almost the next decade(if I get a decent paying job and I dont ever get laid off or end up on unemployment) repaying the loan. I thought I was 2 years short of 30- I am not growing younger, I want a family. So well, now the choices are laid out, and I am not unhappy about it. Mostly life directs us to the path we are to take. So I am guessing(or justifying)that was not the path I had to go on.
Thank you Absinthedeath, OnlyMissy and Arolkayalfay, for dropping by and leaving me good wishes. :)
I have come to visit via Giles and I have found your experience interesting. I have often wondered about foreigners that arrive in America and what their perceptions of life might be. True we have the freedoms to attain and do most anything, but perhaps we have lost sight of our real grass roots...so to speak.
I've watched over the years as families and communities have grown in such directions that there is no longer the closeness that once abode here. As you have said, spending beyond one's means is allowed and for the most part families are spending their time trying to outlive the neighbor next door, not in life, but in material gain.
You talk about the heart of our culture and to some of us, it still remains, freedom and a closeness and unity of family...baseball and apple pie...a down home sense of belonging. Sadly for so many it is wealth and material gain.
I hope you look into financial aid that can provide grants, scholarships, and other means of help for continuing your education. Some are even free without having to pay back. I know there are probably roadblocks for not being a citizen, but I'm sure if you continue to pursue your dream, you will attain it.
I certainly appreciate you sharing your insight and experience for it helps to develop relationships across the miles that otherwise would never develop. It helps to share differences and provoke thinking in directions of cultural differences and values. This provides growth and acceptance in understanding one another.
I just spoke today with my friend Lori about what means to be "non-citizen" in terms of paying for college (DOUBLE) and coming from a former communist country like mine, where all my family was in jail and labor camps for sympathizing with the king and not the commies...
I can completely understand all the phases you have been through, because I still have my ordeal here.
Still, I feel America more "home" than Romania ever was for me.
Hi, I'm Ronnie and I also came here from Giles. What a wonderful friend we have in common. It seems that you and I also have a lot in common. Although I am currently sitting in Australia and have been here for two months, I live in Northern California. But in the 70's I also lived in Washington DC. I can relate to everything you have mentioned here as I find it incredibly difficult living in another country at times. I can tell you one thing though, and that is that I will always call Australia Home no matter where I live.
I am not returning home until March 14th and until that time am online very rarely, although once back I should be back to normal, which is heaps of time online. I would love to invite you as a friend, but hope that you understand that until I get back I amy not be able to be in contact very much.
Thanks so much for opening your blog to us all. Many of my wonderful friends have visited you already, I see.
Firstly, thank you for making your blog available to everyone. (I came via Giles')
It's interesting... many of the observations you made are familiar to me, although I was 7 when we arrived in Australia, it was still an overwhelming experience. At least you knew English... for me it was the fourth language I had to learn LOL.
Wishing every success in your new "home". It certainly sounds like you're settled and enjoying it.
I too came from via Giles. Your story is so interesting. I am married to a British citizen, currently living in Ireland. We are working on his immigration paperwork now. Meanwhile, he is living in Ireland so he can still work. Your husband was so right about the driving, my husband does not drive, and I have told him it will be absolutely necessary for him to drive here. Thank you for opening this blog. You have given me a perspective that will help me when my husband moves here.
Another visitor from Giles' page! What a beautiful blog! You are so right that people are people, no matter where they are. I had some similar experiences just moving from New Jersey where I grew up to New Mexico and then to Florida and now Ohio. Things were so very different from place to place. My husband also worked all day and I was left to find something to do, to make friends, etc. In New Mexico it was a bit harder, but I made one close friend. In Florida there was so much prejudice against "Yankees" (anyone from up North) that I wound up first making friends with other transplants from New Jersey & New York. Eventually through my church, I met great people and had a circle of friends. But then...the job situation brought us to Ohio and I had to start over yet again. It was much easier here...I think having kids and being part of the homeschool community made it easier. Anyhow, without even coming from another country I found the subcultures in this country challenging.
Hi Rashmi, thank you for this wonderful entry.... and thank you Giles, for leading us to this page! I found myself smiling and nodding most of the time- its that 'been there' feeling....
Mauritius and India are not vastly different culturewise (its more like stepping back in time, people here cling to the beliefs their ancestors brought with them), but the rest of it is the same- the initial loneliness- the feeling of being uprooted- leaving your pals behind- finding it difficult to make new friends to same level of familiarity....
I felt a little of what you have mentioned about the US experience when I visited the place a few years ago.... the bit about credit cards and dust-free shelves is hilarious! And yes- the libraries got my attention too!
Thanks again and all the best!
I love your perspectives. You are so good at letting us see through the eyes of Rashmi. Thank YOU for sharring. Brilliant as usual *wink*
I came here to from Giles page,.........wow what great reading......".I have been there with you." You write brilliant. ........A great command of the English language you have here, Have you thought about writing a book? I think you put on paper your feelings so well . Thank you for letting me be "part" of your life through your eyes..............and so glad Giles pointed me to your page
Hey, hey, City. That's my question. I've asked her that already on a previous blog.
I also came here from Gile's page,,,,,and I loved reading this story also...the things that we americans take for granted,,,
Thank you for sharing, like many others I've been pointed here by Giles. An interesting and thought provoking insight into life of an immigrant. Fortunately (or perhaps not) I have lived all my life here in Britain and so have no experience like this to draw on. My Grandmother was a German who married a British soldier in the 1920's before settling here. It was something we rarely talked about, after all having a German background after two world wars hardly endeared us to everyone else.
I'm glad to have read this today and I look forward to having the opportunity to read more in the future if we are allowed. Thank you once again.
Sorry Giles did not know you had already asked the question,........see great minds think alike ! But after reading this I can see a Book in the near future and it would be a Best Seller too
I am overwhelmed with your responses. Thank you for Being Kind enough to read a LONG blog :) about something that is a Stranger's experience. Thank you Giles and CityBreeze for the compliments and for having such Hopes for Me :).
Thank you Flutterbee for leaving your thoughts.
I think its a human condition to want to be the Joneses. Its a way we fit in under the circumstances 'cause for the most part we judge via appearances. And something always gives when we become focussed on one thing or the other.. so focussing on material Gains does leave less time and less inclination for the matters of the heart/spirit. But I think most of us strive for balance, to have that most valuable intangible asset in our lives(human bonds) and to have a materially good life.
You need to hang in there Tiger. The initial discomfort will wear off, after a while you may not even notice it. Focus on what you came here for, things usually work out.
Thank you Ronnie, for your kind words. Take your time, do what needs doing.
I get that. I still call India home, although the last time I visited there I felt like I landed in Mars cause its changing and the changes are very apparent. I do it very unconsciously.
LOL Mila, I am lucky, I knew English, thanks to my father who was Bent on making it so.. English Language was the legacy the British left in India. Between me, my husband and kids we speak four different languages. Its funny sometimes cause there are times when my kids use words from three languages in one sentence. Yes, with the Kids around, whats not to enjoy :).
I am glad you can use this to help your husband. Thank you for Coming by and leaving your thoughts :)
"Anyhow, without even coming from another country I found the subcultures in this country challenging."
Thank you for dropping by and leaving your comments.. :). Yes, People are people no matter where they are.
I find that happen in India too. Move about 40 Kms(not miles) and the language is different, people are different and the way they view life is different.
Hello Danda, welcome to my page. Glad to meet another person with the "Been there" feeling, Lover of the Libraries. I could actually spend my life in a Library :) (ok, I exagerrated, just a tad).
I really wanted to take the Dust-free Technology to India, no kidding, it would have saved me so many visits to the doc to cure allergies.
Thank you for dropping by Tugar and for the Compliments :).
Welcome to my page Equine. LOL, isnt that the case with all Humans.. Taking for Granted all things, Abusing what can be Used and then realizing that you had something valuable only when you lose it?
Thank you for dropping by, Glad you enjoyed the read.
I have read about how ancestry is rarely talked off if its is something that can cause the present generation trouble. But I still think the family ought to know where they are from so that they can feel that sense of groundedness about their Belonging, their strengths etc.
Hi Mithuna :-), I think I remember you from one of my friends pages... I'm PK over there :-). I came from Giles page... Everyone would like to have what they don't have...lol. My love would be to live in India, it is such a beautiful place:-). I was raised in Venezuela, Puerto Rico, and the Virgin Islands, when I came here it was total culture shock for me... I am happy for you that you have been able to assimilate into our country, welcome to it, and I enjoyed the read Mithuna :-). ((Hugs))
Yesterday, with wind chill, it was -19 here, which I believe is -28C. I've seen pictures of India, with cars all over the road and bicycles in between. Is that how it really is? I'm used to, as you said, people actually following the driving rules.
Another thing about America is that people identify themselves as German, Irish, Italian, Spanish, etc, rather than American, even if they're born here.
So... what do you like about America? What do you dislike? What do you find the most interesting?
Welcome to my page Ze Baron. -28 C is too cold for me
Yes, that is the truth about Indian Traffic, there the rules are there to be broken. Most anyone coming from a country which respects traffic rules will have an Instant lesson in "survival of the fittest" on Indian Roads.
Indians usually identify themselves either with the region they are from, their native language or their caste lines. Its changing with the advent of Globalization but the change is apparent in the Cities, not so much in the small pockets of our rural countryside.
I like the fact that the Tax is actually used to provide amenities to the citizens(Ok, there might be corruption there that I am yet to see) At least, the ambulance/police/fireengine does appear within a stipulated time, The Public School Systems work majority of the times and the standard in those schools are not Bad as opposed to having a really low standard in Public schools in India. I like the fact that we dont have to go to a bank and wait for over 30 mins. in line to withdraw our hard earned money. I like the orderliness in which elections are run in this country.
I dislike the Foreign Policies especially the part where they police other nations, sort of like do what I say but dont look at what I do attitude. I dislike the fact that citizens misuse the judicial system due to their "sue happy" attitude. I dislike the fact that people whose occupation is Religion/Spirituality are able to influence Governance(I dont mind the ethics but I am against Moral Policing, which I feel can be done in other ways, not through politics).
What I find Interesting is that even though its on the Opposite side from where I am from... just like in my own country, on an Average - people are kind, considerate, they aspire for similar things. I find the Connection very Amazing, it defies those studies about nature, nurture and emotions.
Ah I remember comments from you from comments on Shailji's page. Welcome to my page on Multiply :).Thanks for enjoying the read.
Thank you for dropping by and enjoying..Welcome to my page on Multiply. :) I remember PK from Shailji's page.. same one?
Thank you Rashmi (also have come via Gile's page). I really enjoyed reading this. All the Best.
Still going strong here, Rashmi.
Btw Duchess Ronnie is a very good egg indeed.
Is that the same Ronnie you were Pining over sometime ago(I am kidding)
Yes, she seems to be slowly returning to Planet Blog.
I am glad she is, I Hope to see a Less Melancholy you :).
It's supposed to be Less Ugly Me.
:). Hmm.. I guess thats in the eye of the Beholder...
It'just a joke I had going from Yahoo with a few people.
Today I have been bouncing through blogland and ended up here. I loved your blog - it felt as though I were there with you. I do understand a tiny portion of the culture shock. I did a little traveling this past year and being away from home - I was fascinated at all the little differences. People are people though. :)
I live in Southern Oregon - so the sun is shining today - we do not get as much rain as you do at the far end of the state. When people ask about the rain, I reply with "How do you think it all stays so green?" :)
Thank you for the small look into your insights. I truly enjoyed it! T
thanks to gilesy01 for mentioning this blog
in one of his blog posts.
Rashmi, this one's very interesting indeed.
thanks for humoring me and answering the questions.
you are welcome :)
namaste...reading this text moved me...i used to date an idian man who immigrated to the USA when he was a teenager, he was at that time living in NYC i was living in Montreal...i remember him telling me ''in India I am an american, but in America I am an Indian...''
i passed through from amalie's via giles, i'm not a friend of his but he always blogs about interesting issues, which are raised diplomatically as are your comments.
I am British [English] and there are so many observations i would love to touch on that you have made, there is a saying in English that travels broadens the mind, this was a saying before the packaged holiday when a lot of europeans just wanted a different climate with their own same culture and food etc....I have never been to India but have always wanted to go, but i have read and watch tv programs about indian life and history, the diversity of religion/culture/food there.
it is easier to stand outside oneself when we leave our comfort zone, do we want to feel safe or adventurous, usually a mixture, i know that i was exposed to "foreign" food at a very young age, we had a thai family stay with us and they used to cook for us on a friday night way back in the 60's, they used to get some of their ingredients from an indian grocery shop, as this was the only shop in bath that sold "ethnic" food
the history of food is compelling, that before us europeans stumbled upon america, india had no chillies or any member of the capsicum family, although aubergines evolved in asia as well as sugar and coffee...the coconut is one of few that made it around the world by itself unaided by man.
indian food is the best, vegetables are so much easier to eat and delicious cooked indian style,. I hope you can get the ingredients over there, basmati rice is becoming very expensive here at the moment, we tend to eat this rice in england, its more popular in northern india n Pakistan, my sister can get it in California, my shri lankan friends say they eat a smaller and stickier type of rice, as well as breads and noodles [string hopper?]...love to hear about what you like cooking in your region back home [where the hat isn't lol] very much enjoyed reading your blog, you write better than most English people.....expecially doctors lol...giles may explain
I also found your page via Giles. Your fabulous story reminds me of an excellent film, "The Namesake". Your feelings of awe and loneliness when you first arrived in the US were captured in that movie. Thank you for sharing your story with the public.
:) Thank you for taking time reading and leaving comments. I read part of the Book. I have to read it completely now. I guess the sense of Awe and Loneliness will always remain, although we might become desensitized to it after a while...
Funny I didn't have these three segments ( US Experience ) to learn more about you before... and somehow I am glad I didn't .. I would never have guessed your predicament from the place we met. I, too began a new life.. all on my own , in 1996. It certainly wakes up those places we thought we didn't have to wake up. Not being able to depend on another resource to carry us through. Just us.. and figuring how to do life in a foreign arena. Albeit , the customs were not an issue... But a single woman in a foreign place is indeed a challenging yet entirely empowering experience. Love these 3 pieces (fast forward anyone reading this ) lol
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