Monday, April 28, 2008

Choosing Insanity

Each time she fell
She sat alone
Nursing her wounds
Vowing "NEVER AGAIN"
Thinking "Never Ever"
Never letting anyone close
Sparing them the pain,
Or was it for herself?

She thought,
If I did this long enough
I would never need anyone
Never Depend on anyone
Never want anything
Being self-contained
Life would be bliss.

Two decades past
Since she made the vow
Yet, she watches in vain
The beautiful patterns of hurt
Always ending with a vow-
Of "Never Again's and the Never Ever's"
She sighs, "I must be Insane."

K P Rashmi- April 2008

12 comments:

jo la ranita said...

I would never need anyone
Never Depend on anyone
Never want anything
Being self-contained
Life would be bliss.

I can relate to that...but I know it cannot be, we need...we will always need someone and something...

very nice poem, thank you for sharing..

Mindsnomad Yay said...

Sometimes I do wish it were true, if nothing at least the "Never want anything" part

C * said...

Hugs..

C * said...

I felt the same for so many times..

Beautiful poem, Rashmi!

BLINGKINGCAT ASTROPHIC said...

another gem
thank you
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Marina T said...

Ah, I can relate to this one, me and hundreds, thousands of others I guess! lol

The thing is, people shouldn't *need* anyone. That's where the sorrow comes from. Why is love so often connected to verbs like *need* or *depend*? And when does love become an addiction?
There was a time in my life, not longtime ago, that I lost trust in people and I was thinking that it would be really hard for me to love again. Not that I won't, but not sure how "pure" this love will be from now on. But at the end, you just realize that this is how life is, we move into circles. We experience situations and we do get more mature, but deep inside, we often repeat the same mistakes.

Giles Y Owen said...

That is a very profound poem.

Mindsnomad Yay said...

I have theories on why the NEED and DEPEND happens, but not real proof of it. I think it stems from a this wanting to be connected, to belong, to be useful, to feel that sense of purpose and dignity in someway. Love is an addiction to "feeling good" if you want to think of it as an addiction. Its like knowing how good a fresh early morning cup of coffee feels. Even if you dont drink it, if you know you can have coffee anytime you wish, it is a great feeling.. ;)

Mindsnomad Yay said...

Claudia, Bella and Giles, thank you :).

Brandon Stocks said...

Rashmi I like it.

Mark Richards said...

Hmmmm. Reminds me of a former gf I had. Very much a prisoner of her own mind and the constant trap of never evers again.

Great poem,

Here is my contribution, hope you enjoy my poems. http://markg1.multiply.com/journal/item/212/Poetry_Of_My_Soul_We_need..._?replies_read=9

Anju R said...

awesome!